CALGARY, Alberta – The rate at which global greenhouse gases have been increasing in recent decades is beginning to slow, and all of technology and policy tools needed for the deep reductions required to keep global warming below the tipping point are ready to use now. To this end, enter Calgary-based Cool World Technologies and its plan to directly combat global warming right at the earth’s surface with its ground-breaking new Snowfake 2000tm technology.
The 7-person startup is on an aggressive mission to put the brakes on global warming one Snowfake at a time. 2P News business reporter Rodecker Smith caught up with the company’s president, Eaton Beaver, this morning.
“We’ve all heard about global warming and how bad it is for mankind and all other living things on earth. So I thought, why not combat global warming with global cooling? If we can cool the surface of the earth, that will in-turn cool the average temperature of our atmosphere, and then… tah dah! problem solved!” – Eaton Beaver, P.Eng., President
Cool World Technologies has formulated an additive from synthetic panda feces that when added to natural gas in a thermal vacuum atomizer, creates artificial snow that will not melt below 20 degrees celsius. The idea behind the company’s global cooling plan is to create snow for climates that typically don’t see snow, starting in southern California.
The company figures the more of its Snowfake 2000tm product that it can lay down in the warmer climates, the faster the temperature of the earth’s surface will cool, which will in-turn reduce the average temperature of the globe. Cool World’s public relations manager, Eileen Ulick, believes their new product has many additional benefits on top of supporting global cooling. “Our mantra is, ‘Snow for Everyone.’ Why should snow be reserved for those living in colder climates. There are people in central America who have only dreamed about sledding, and guess what, Snowfake 2000tm will make those dreams come true,” Miss Ulick told reporters outside a pub along Stephen Avenue.
Dr. Oliver Closeoff, with the University of Calgary’s Department of Climate Sciences, supports Cool World’s global cooling strategy and says that it’s about time that climates straddling roughly 30 degrees of the equator started to cool down. “Have you ever wondered why countries on and near to the equator are so hot? Well, it’s because that’s where global warming starts, and then spreads closer to the poles. By cooling countries in these regions with this synthetic formulated with panda feces, we will hit global warming right square in the heart. This is the place where we need to attack the problem. These guys from Cool World are really onto something here.”