Silversmith, Ontario – The Canadian National Association of Wiccans and Astrologists has recently published their in-house newsletter revealing the truth behind climate change and global temperature rise. The study was completed by several 4th Moon of The Starcrust students within the CNAWA, and then the data was vetted by a Master Earthsmith prior to publishing, ensuring the credibility of the data.
The CNAWA believes that over thousands of years, human kind has allowed their mystical evolution to grow unchecked, resulting in many contradictory and entangled events mixing and mingling uncontrollably. This has resulted in hundreds of unintended consequences, Climate Change being the predominant focus in this study. It seems that casting curses and spells on your enemies, dancing for rain, trying to raise the dead, and wishing on pennies, has nearly doomed the planet as we know it.
“The study has pulled back the curtain on this global epidemic of changing climate and ecological crisis. We discovered, the proved, is actually driven by a variety of age old conflicting spells and enchantments Beginning in the Dark Ages and continuing into our current astrological framework. The powerful castings and conjurings from different temples, cultures, and orders over thousands of years have commingled into a stellar hodgepodge of interfering auras and mysticism. – Cammi Stormleaf, 5th religious Master of The House of Granti
The CNAWA has proposed a solution to the issue, a sort of global summit intended to bring together those invested in the Spiritual and Mystical, and undo the damage done by previous generations over the course of human history. The event would need to be held in a large underground cave, close to the Earth’s feelings, and a superset of enchantments cast to bring the balance back to the planet and save humanity from itself.
While the CNAWA admits there are other contributing factors when looking at Climate Change, the study concluded the Mystical was the most important to deal with, and that other factors like CO2 and other air pollutants were minimal by scale.
On that note, they did want to invite Greta to the Earth Event in hopes she can inspire today’s youth to take a harder look at the Spiritual and Mystical world, and prevent another calamity of this magnitude. 2P News reached out to Greta and is currently awaiting a response that we understand is en route via carrier pigeon.
The wonderful thing about modern society is you can get Skip The Dishes from virtually anywhere. Possibly even a cave.