VEET will make this a thing of the past!

OTTAWA, Ontario – In light of all of the hoopla around the environment, CO2 emissions, and climate change in recent times, Transportation Canada has teamed up with Shall Oil and BigDog Energy to introduce a new emissions capture technology that they claim will significantly reduce vehicle emissions. The organizations say if things go as planned, CO2 and pretty much all other emissions vehicle exhaust emissions currently getting into the atmosphere will be reduced by 100%.

Mithcell Snorceroony, Transporation Canada

“We have teen climate change activist Greta Thunberg to thank for this initiative. If she can cut her carbon footprint by sailing across the Atlantic Ocean in a wind-powered boat with no toilet, then we should be able to do more. What an inspiration she is!” – Mitchell Snorceroony, CO2 Reduction Team Lead with Transportation Canada

The idea behind the new process, which is called Vehicle Emission Elimination Technology (VEET), is described here.

  1. A specialized canister, resembling a propane tank, is retrofitted to the tip of a vehicle’s exhaust tip just downstream of a mini-compressor that is driven by the flow of exhaust gases.
  2. All of the vehicle’s exhaust gasses are then compressed and fed into the canister that is rated at 450,000 psi.
  3. When the canister is at capacity, it sends a signal to the driver’s cellular mobile radio telephone notifying him or her that it is time to visit the closest Shall or BigDog gas station.
  4. No fewer than 2 former oil and gas engineers will use specialized equipment and gloves to carefully remove the canister and empty it into made-for-purpose facility that pumps the canister’s contents into emission sequestration reservoirs tens of meters underneath each participating gas station.
  5. The vehicle is then fitted with an empty canister and is ready to fill up with gas so that the driver can get on his or her way.
  6. The entire canister-dump process is supervised by a former manager of exploration geology.

The engineer who led the VEET development team describes a feature that the driver can activate when he or she needs some extra power for highway passing.

“So here’s how it works… the driver taps on the Turbo button on the VEET mobile app, and provided the canister’s pressure is at least 20,000 psi, it releases its high-pressure emissions contents backwards thereby providing the vehicle a temporary forward boost. We know that defeats VEET’s entire purpose, but man is it fun,” said Marsha Wiffburger.

But she warns that it is critical that drivers do not continue driving after canister is full because one of two things will happen. The vehicle will automatically disable itself since air will not be able to pass through its engine, or the vehicle will explode.

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